I am sorry, dsb268, that you, too, are struggling. Have you let your people, your providers, know that you now consider yourself among the working poor? Your employer should know. Your representatives (local, state and in Washington) should be informed. It is sometimes said that nurses don't have a voice, or don't assert themselves. I encourage you to speak up. If nothing else, speak up to your local media/TV stations. In my area, the "consumer" reporters often respond to stories like yours.
This is really about more than Obamacare. It is the big picture for your family: daycare expenses, health insurance increases and cost-of-living salary increases for both you and your spouse. I don't know how you feel about asking for help from your church, or from a food pantry. I don't know how you feel about shopping at resale shops. That is how I have cut back. Just this year, I have cut back on my insurance coverage and on my cell phone bill. I have come to love the resale shops and the Goodwill. It feels like deprivation at first, but after a while, it feels like you were smart and got a bargain.
I wish you and all who have to cut back the very best! You will figure it out and you will prevail because your heart is in the right place.